♥ A Kangaroo's Diary [袋鼠的日記]

Packed my wardrobe!

2012-03-17T13:21:00.000+08:00

Finally, finally, finally done that last sunday!

Well, nearly 40% of it anyway. :B

Very overloaded, hope it doesn't break :/

Top left: A line skirts above knee length

Top right:: Bandage/ straight cut skirts above knee length

Bottom: Maxi skirts/ midis

My brother's ancient performance costume when he was around 4 years old?

WHAT IS IT DOING IN MY CLOSET =_="

And mine! :D

I love the one in the centre the most, so pink and dainty :>

WFSH. The free bag I got on a exchange programme to Taiwan.

I'll probably carry this huge bag around when I go to uni.

HUGEASS BAGS ROCK :P

Top: Bags

Bottom left: sweaters/ cardis

Bottom right: Leather stuffs and useless hats

Top left: Jeans/ Pants

Top right: Maxi dresses

Bottom: Shorts (how did I manage to buy so many! Omg *ashamed*)

So there, I still have my dresses and tops (a hell lot of them) not cleared. I WILL CLEAR IT BY THIS WEEKEND. And impose a shopping ban on myself. No more shopping until next month (by this I meant till my next paycheck comes in).

Things to complete:
1. Decide on what I really want to study in university ASAP. Time is running out.
2. Submit my university application for NTU/ NUS by this Sunday.
3. Brush up on my 300 word essay for SMU application by next Wednesday, submit the hardcopy to the SMU admission office by next Sunday.
4. Meet up with my JC friends. I MISS ALL OF YOU WHY YOU NO MEET UP WITH ME?? :(((((

5. Recover from flu already, hate being sick! >:(

Just messing around with my webcam. LOL.

Down with flu :/

2012-03-15T20:50:00.000+08:00

The flu virus is too strong. Resistance is futile. D':

I felt horrible this morning when my alarm woke me up, with a blocked nose plus a stabbing pain in my head (probably a migraine). It was that bad that I had to take a day off. As much as I'd wanted to sleep my pain away, the throbbing pain kept me awfully wide awake (scumbag pain), I had no choice but to be awake. Luckily I didn't have to whip up my own breakfast, that would have sucked. So I played around with my phone's camera and took short naps whenever I felt the sleep bug bite me. :P

Sick, but still eating junk :S

Read a book.

This is interesting. Those who have balanced self-perceptions, assign responsibility for success and failure more evenhandedly and have more realistic predictions for the future are living testimony to the dangers of self-knowledge. They are clinically depressed.

I guess optimism keeps you alive.

SHINEE jigsaw puzzle!

My awesome colleague YY gave it to me yesterday at work :D :D :D

I've got the poster as well :D Hehehehe!

I need a hair cut. And some conditioner. And less food.

This is your lovely kangaroo signing off, looking extremely pale today :<

And those dark eye circles?

SIGH.

What's done so far.

2012-03-13T21:16:00.000+08:00

I'd like to sit alone in a corner, by the window. I'll gaze at the clouds floating by and lose myself in my wildest thoughts as I take a break. I'll let my imagination take me where I wouldn't have gone physically. My mind wanders freely.

After more than three months of doing nearly the same thing, I find myself lusting for change of environment. I want/ need excitement. I need to be challenged, pushed and stressed (I'm probably mental -_-). I'm afraid this laid back environment will make me feel too much at ease. I'm afraid I'll slip and give in. I'm afraid.

New job hunting starts now! :)

On a side note, today (or rather yesterday) is payday! Screw the "I'm rich" notion, I've debts to repay :( Still, everything will go according to plan because I will it to be so. :D

Allowance for parents and grans! <3

What you want and what you have.

2012-03-11T01:01:00.000+08:00

"Fear can't hurt you. When it washes over you, give it no power. It's a snake with no venom. Remember that. That knowledge can save you."

- From The Name Of The Star

Another week just slipped past like that.

Time is ticking, I know. I have to act fast. Decide fast. Think fast. React fast. This never ending rush for deadlines will remain and become an even bigger part of my life in time to come. I will adapt fast with ease. Nothing's gonna stop me, not even divine intervention. I will not let others tell me, "no, you can't do this, no, you wouldn't be able to do that" or be deceived by their lies, "hey I can help if (conditional)". Hell no.

I will (as much as it is unhealthy) stick with the company I know I can trust. I have taken too many leaps of faith for undeserving people, you just proved me to be one of them. In case you don't already know, I don't fall the the same trick twice. So there. Find you next victim, oh, do target someone who I'm not close with, else, you will be dead, I swear.

But I'm thankful for the experience. I'm grateful that, at least when I scan my mind for people I could trust, at least 10 faces popped out in my mind. Lovely. :)

Liars aside, supper has always been my favourite meal of the day (night), although it is fattening.

It looks like a gooey mess, but believe me, this is heavenly durian cake at it's best.

With lots of fattening but oh-so-yummeh cream.

Digging into the fridge must be one of my favourite activities.

Moving on.

2012-03-06T17:57:00.002+08:00

I have submitted my appeal form. This probably wouldn't interest you but I just feel like writing it out because I feel like I have just dumped money into the sea. -_-

Nothing's going to change, it'll probably remain the same unless some higher power up there decided that I have been a good girl for these 18 years and miraculously work their magic to change my grades for me. It's still going to be the same. I've found other alternative ways to get around the problem, take up an EL module in uni or pass the QET or sit for SATs. At this point of time, having some higher power work some miracles seems like the best possible way for things to turn out. LOL. Just musing.

It's back to work tomorrow. Urgh.

I'll miss staying home to do some quiet readings (of my choice).

Er, so, I am alive.

2012-03-03T22:33:00.000+08:00

Yes, as the title suggests, I am still alive. Which means I didn't do that badly for me to want to commit suicide. It's quite an unnerving experience actually. Before I received my A level results, I dreamt of myself climbing up a mountain after receiving my A levels results, like a leisurely climb (and I thought I was just relieving some memories of my Tahan days) before reaching the peak. After taking in the bird's eye view of the breathtaking scenery, I (in my dream) did something unimaginable.

I leaped off the cliff.

What.

The.

Muffins.

Did.

Dream.

Of???

Me committing suicide after I saw my results.

So ominous, I woke up in tears and fear, swearing all the swear words my vocabulary holds, in English, Mandarin, Hokkien, Canto and even Korean wtf. This was one dream I couldn't bring myself to relate to others.

I am quite easily satisfied. A B-grade would do for me, an A would be a miracle granted by some holy being high above. And I was expecting the fail Chem as usual. I had great expectations for my GP which I slogged so hard for. I did GP exercises every single fucking day of my (JC) existence, be it building my vocab, doing essay plans or compre practices (reading newspapers and mags are a MUST and are not counted in the endless list of things I have done). My "strongest" subject was GP. Never did I expect such a ridiculous grade for GP, especially when it was GP. Hence, my first reaction to my GP grade was:

I really thought I saw it wrongly. Then I took a second glance and then a third and many many more.

Nothing changed. Then I realised I didn't see it wrongly. It was real, in front of my eyes.

I went back to my pillars of support. I guess my face said it all. Chooni asked me to cry it out if I did badly. I broke down, couldn't hide my shock, disappointment, fear, insecurities anymore. I had done very badly on the whole for BCMEGP, not only by our cohort's standards, but by my own expectations, my parent's expectations. I had failed as a role model for my brother, who sincerely believes that his sister could do well. I had failed as a student of The School, which I am ashamed to say that I had been in the school at all. I doubted my very existence. I was wasting space and precious oxygen. I cried for hours until my eyes were swollen and I couldn't open them. I cried until my head hurt. I cried until I had to gasp for breathe. I cried until the pain in my heart numbed.

It felt so good.

I had been immune to pain for the longest time ever. I had forgotten how to cry. The release of emotions came at a good time.

I have fallen to pit bottom. It is okay. I will make it okay. I can't change my grades, but I can determine the course of action to pursue after this. I can make it right again. I have a feeling that I can still make it for the course of my first choice, which doesn't look at my GP grades, especially not that.

I have hope.

I have family. My closest relatives, my aunt and uncles whom I've stayed with since young gave my long phone calls of concern that burned my ears. My uncle who doted on me a lot since young brought me a lot of durian snacks which stink up the entire fridge (which my brother thus refused to open now LOL). My brother bought me chocolate muffins after hearing about the fuzzy fact that I "didn't do well".

My secondary school BFFs typed me wordy smses that gave me strength. To quote: "And if you don't have the strength to do so (pick yourself up) just yet, amie and I will give you a hand".

My JC friends also sent DMs and smses. All of them had the same message, to quote: "friends will always be there for you no matter what, stay strong". Gunikey the hybrid stayed with me to ensure that I was still alive and kicking and Puisan the hugger hugged me to death. Chunhui gave me manly pats on the back. Curls and Chooni sent encouraging DMs.

Some anonymous people sent me their best wishes (I have no idea who you are) via formspring. And so many more, who sent the "are you okay" text instead of the bloody "did you score straight As" text.

Then I went on fb and saw this status: "The worst feeling is not letting yourself down but disappointing those who love you." A girl commented: "But the people who you love will always love you no matter what."

I am loved. And I will always be loved.

And for those people who did badly, read again.

YOU ARE LOVED. AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE THEIR LOVE FOR YOU.

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

And then I recalled I sent Gene a tweet of hope before the A levels.

"Where there is love and inspiration, you cannot go wrong."

Yes. They'll bring me to the right direction. And when I look back at those two years, I can safely say that I made right choices and wrong choices, that nurtured me to who I am today.

I joined a tough CCA. And survived it when some expressed their doubts to me that I could even endure it in the first place. It wouldn't have been possible if I had gone to any other school because my CCA is so unique, only Hwachong has it.

TAHAN MOUNTAIN TREKKING CLUB.

We graduated. With lots of fun of course!

Our second trip. Which I screwed up quite a bit :S

Survived in the cold rain. Falling sick the next day :P

Before our selection test. Nerves.

Hardcore gym-ing turned camwhoring session.

Finally got shirts for Our Batch. The 35th.

In class, I made close friends.

I went for an exchange with Taiwanese students.

I had the BEST PW group in 10s7c.

Had lots of fun.

Organised Service Learning.

Had even more fun with my awesome class.

Still kept my secondary school lovers close at heart.

Made even more close friends with the other classmates in 2011.

I love every single one of you.

I don't know if you have noticed, the black ring in the first picture is actually something very familiar to all the 10S7C-ers. We all have one of it, be it black or silver. It's called the Class Ring. We may not have done well this time, but remember a piece of paper with mere alphabets on it does not determine our ability nor our future.

Because I learnt from Tahan that there is no long road to your destination. There is only a short route and a shorter one because if you keep on moving, you will ultimately reach your destination. Perseverance is the key. When you fail for the umpteenth time and you feel like giving up, hope whispers, why not try one more time?

Change your perspective.

Remember, I love you.

Always.

Come tomorrow.

2012-03-01T20:48:00.000+08:00

Release of results this Friday.

That's enough to earn me a mini heart attack.

So I'll be like this in the eyes of everyone,

But actually deep inside I'll be like,

So I'll end up doing this,

After I receive my results all those who know me, care about me, or those who didn't give a damn to me previously and acted as if I didn't exist would come and ask me how I did when it's none of their business.

I'll be thinking,

But on the surface, I shall be nice and be like,

*resigned to fate*

But in my heart I'll be like,

And when I go back to the office on monday and people start questioning me I'll be like,

But instead I'll say,

But they won't understand.

It won't work well. Soon, I'll realise,

ALL THE BEST MY LOVED ONES! :D

I love all of you equally much!

*hug hug hug*

Have faith my sweeties!

I'm trying hard not to think of the worse possible scenario but it keeps flashing in my mind.

I. Am. Truly. In. A. Wreck.

Supper

2012-02-28T20:35:00.000+08:00

Dipping those biscuits into chocolate milk is loveeeeeeeee!

Although it's sinful, but it tastes so good it's hard to resist! :P

PS: It may look/ sound disgusting but trust me, it's an awesome treat before bed time ;)

to the hall this Friday?!?!?! :<

变形计 (deformation)

2012-02-25T08:04:00.000+08:00

升级后的第五季《变形计》，将聚焦都市独生子女迷恋网络、逃学、狂热追星等“现代病”。《变形计》是湖南卫视重点研发的一档生活类角色互换节目，这档节目结合当下社会热点，寻找热点中的当局人物，安排他们进行互换人生体验，参与节目的双方就在七天之中互换角色，体验对方的生活。节目同时全程每天24小时跟拍，粗加剪辑后原生态播出。它是中国第一档生活角色互换类节目。

I've been watching this series of reality TV produced by China's Hunan TV. It's about 2 children, one from the rural countryside and the other from the city, exchanging lives for seven days to experience the other party's lifestyle.

Many people doubt the authenticity of the emotions portrayed by those who went on the show, saying that the show was too scripted and dramatic. After all, how can a mere seven days change the way you think and live? But remember, kids have the purest, most innocent thoughts, they're like play-dohs, easy to mold and shape. Don't doubt, have faith, that people do change for the better, even in the seemingly most insignificant way. ❤

Money can't buy everything, yet you can do without it either.
As we become materially richer, we become mentally poorer. Do you agree?

I'm singing my blues

2012-02-23T12:05:00.000+08:00

The winter had passed
And the spring has come
We have withered
And our hearts are bruised from longing

(i’m singing my blues)
Used to the blue tears, blue sorrow
(i’m singing my blues)
The love that i have sent away with the floating clouds, oh oh
Under the same sky, at different places
Because you and i are dangerous
I am leaving you

One letter difference from ‘nim’
It’s cowardly but i’m hiding because i’m not good enough
Cruel breakup is like the end of the road of love
No words can comfort me
Perhaps my lifetime’s last melodrama
Now its final curtain is coming downI was born and i met you
And i have loved you to death
My cold heart that has been dyed blue
Even with my eyes closed, i can’t feel you

The winter had passed
And the spring has come
We have withered
And our hearts are bruised from longing

(i’m singing my blues)
Used to the blue tears, blue sorrow
(i’m singing my blues)
The love that i have sent away with the floating clouds, oh ohI feel like my heart has stopped beating
You and i, frozen there, after a war
Trauma, that has been carved in my head

Once these tears dry up, i will moistly remember my love
I’m neither painful nor lonely
Happiness is all self-talk
I can’t stand something more complicated
It’s no big deal, i don’t care
Inevitable wandering, people come and go
I was born and i met you
And i have loved you to deathMy cold heart that has been dyed blue
Even if you have left, i’m still here

(i’m singing my blues)
Used to the blue tears, blue sorrow
(i’m singing my blues)
The love that i have sent away with the floating clouds, oh oh
Again tonight, underneath that blue moonlight
I will probably fall asleep alone
Even in my dreams, i look for you
And wander around while singing this song

(i’m singing my blues)
Used to the blue tears, blue sorrow
(i’m singing my blues)
The love that i have sent away with the floating clouds, oh oh
(i’m singing my blues)

Used to the blue tears, blue sorrow
(i’m singing my blues)
The love that i have sent away with the floating clouds, oh oh

My personal miracles.

2012-02-21T21:50:00.000+08:00

For always being there to cheer me up when I was down.

For the numerous inside jokes we share.

For the many many late night calls we made.

For the many bully sessions we had over twitter and fb.

Let's go out more often together! :D

Love,

It'll only get better.

2012-02-19T01:01:00.000+08:00

It's Monday (in the wee hours) but I haven't felt the horrible Monday blues for quite some time now. Work is as enjoyable and entertaining as ever, minus the fact that we have to be desk-bound for eight hours (which is tolerable). Plus we're starting on something new now. :)

I'd promised myself to start tidying up my wardrobe since forever but I kept delaying the spring cleaning process. My goodness, I feel so guilty whenever I open my wardrobe. The last time I spring cleaned it was after my mid-years? I just folded all the clothes nicely and stuffed everything back in. So much for spring cleaning -_-

All my loots I've gotten since secondary two (which is a good whole 4 years plus back!) are still stuck in my small humble wardrobe (which cannot be closed now omgggggg what did I just do?!?!)

*face palm*

PRESENTING...

Jackets, blazers, normal casual dresses, dressier dresses and formal dress (for what?! I don't need them -_-)

This is only half. PJs, school related tops, etc. Mostly tees.

Jeans, jeans, and more jeans.

Low waisted shorts, high waisted shorts, maxi dresses, midis and more maxis.

Just stockings only. And socks, you name it, I should have it. And nail polishes.

And contact lenses. And all the barang barangs.

This is not inclusive of the many other bags of things I have lying on my bed.

I must stop buying anything and everything.

SEE NO TOUCH.

TOUCH NO SEE.

SEE AND TOUCH, MUST PAY MONEY.

Childish, but whatever. I feel like it. :D

天蠍座 (Scorpios)

2012-02-16T18:37:00.000+08:00

不喜歡依靠別人
但如果你是他想要依靠的人，那請你不要讓他失望。
I don't like to depend on others to do things.
But if I give my trust to you and rely on you to do something for me, please don't disappoint me.

天蠍座的世界很難有人走進
但如果你恰巧走了進去，那請你不要輕易走出來，否則會在他的心裡留下一個漏洞
而那個漏洞對他來說，永遠都不會癒合。
Scorpios usually do not let people into their hearts.
But if you're the rare lucky few who has walked in, please don't give up on us and leave us easily.
You'll leave a scar that will never heal.

如果你看到他的眼淚，請相信這絕不是他在博同情
這是內心驕傲的他不得已的場景
If we let you see our tears, please believe that we're not trying to gain sympathy from you.
It only happens when the seemingly highly confident Scorpio is too broken to hold it inside of them.

天蠍座討厭虛偽，討厭謊言，討厭欺騙。
其實天蠍經常硬撐，即使一百個委屈，都習慣用自己的方式，獨自一人承擔。
We hate hypocrites, liars and especially being lied to.
We will keep all the grievances that we've suffered inside our hearts without telling others.

真正痛苦的候,其實沒人看得見。
他很注重公平。凡事都會分得清清楚楚，不會去占別人便宜。
他非常重感情。只要他真心認定的朋友，都會真心對待。
We won't let anybody see our pain, see where we're hurting or what has hurt us.
We value fairness and we will never take advantage of another.
We place great importance on friendship. As long as we see you as a friend, we'll give in our 101% and treat you like one.

第一直覺對天蠍來說非常的重要
也就是說，一開始喜歡就會越來越喜歡，可以為此付出真心
而如果是第一眼就讓天蠍討厭，那麼在他們的世界基本上就很難改變了
倘若你明知道不受歡迎，還要主動的討好
可別怪他們冷，再怎樣的獻殷勤在天蠍看來也只是作秀，是完全不會領這份情的。
We trust our intuition.

【天蠍座的特性你占幾條？】
1、花很多時間自我交談 (spend lots of time doing self-reflection)
2、喜歡去沒什麼人的地方（如老書店、樓頂等） (enjoy going to less crowded places)
3、討厭束縛喜歡自由 (hates being controlled, loves freedom)
4、相信第六感 (we trust our sixth sense)
5、愛上一個人很容易陷入癡迷 (when we fall in love we become highly devoted/ committed)
6、真心相惜的朋友很重要 (close friends are important)
7、愛逞強 (we like to act tough, even though we may not be as tough as we portray ourselves)
8、感性、容易感動 (sentimental, easily moved by small acts)
9、愛幻想、愛胡思亂想 (love daydreaming!)
10、說話有時侯很毒 (we can be very straightforward and blunt with our words)
11、極其討厭虛偽 (HATES HYPOCRISY TO THE CORE.)

So true, so true. (PS: You can use google translate to view this article if you find my translation too shabby >____<)

Adapted from fp.

Singles Awareness Day

2012-02-14T23:33:00.000+08:00

Nah, just kidding.

Happy valentine's day! :DIf you're attached, good for you, you get to spend it with someone you love. If you're single, good for you too, it's time to show the attached couples how singles can also be happy without a SO (don't have to spend money on dates somemore, wahaha I'm so cheapskate!!). Sadly, valentine's day is too commercialised now. If you and your SO are truly happy together, everyday can be valentine's day! ;D

It's amazing how my attitude towards Vday changes as I grow older. I laugh at how immature I used to be. Heh. Silly thoughts.

Primary school - no idea what Vday is about, too young to bother about it anyway.

Secondary school - had a rough idea what it is about. And I wanted to receive flowers/ chocolates because everyone else is receiving it. Totally sheep mentality *face palms*

JC - was the one giving out chocolates to everyone I know and saw on that day.

Now - whatever. So overrated *partial sour grape lolll*

이젠 나도 사랑하고 싶은데 보란듯이 사랑하고 싶은데!!!

What would i do without you?

2012-02-11T18:20:00.002+08:00

Yet another backdated entry! I don't feel like typing because I'm finally suffering the aftermath of doing data entry for so many days, not to mention the super chiong speed I went for the last few entries, simply because I wanted to finish keying in the data once and for all :S

I think we should spend more time together ;)

Open your eyes.

2012-02-09T20:41:00.000+08:00

没那麽简单就能找到聊得来的伴

It's not that easy to find someone you can click well with,

尤其是在看过了那麽多的背叛
Especially after seeing so many betrayals.
总是不安只好强悍
I'm always uneasy/ uncertain but I pretend to be strong.
谁谋杀了我的浪漫
Who's the one who murdered my romance.

没那麽简单就能去爱别的全不看
It's not that easy to love without considering the costs.
变得实际也许好也许坏各一半
We become practical/ realistic, there are equal pros and cons of becoming this way.
不爱孤单一久也习惯
I don't like to be lonely, but with time, I get used to the loneliness.
不用担心谁也不用被谁管
I don't have to worry about anyone, or get bossed around by anyone.

感觉快乐就忙东忙西
When i feel happy I get busy.
感觉累了就放空自己
When I feel tired I'll relax and put aside my work.
别人说的话随便听一听自己做决定
I listen to what others say without taking them too seriously, I'll make my own decisions.
不想拥有太多情绪
I don't want to be too emotional.
一杯红酒配电影
Watching movies with a glass of red wine in hand.
在周末晚上关上了手机舒服窝在沙发里
On a weekend night, I'd switch off my phone and lie on the sofa.

相爱没有那麽容易每个人有他的脾气
Being in love is not an easy task, everyone has their own temperament.
过了爱做梦的年纪 轰轰烈烈不如平静
I'm over the age of dreaming about how love should be, having a stable relationship beats being intensely in love.
幸福没有那麽容易才会特别让人着迷
Happiness doesn't come easily, that's why we're so obsessed with obtaining it.
什麽都不懂的年纪
When we were young, we knew nothing,
曾经最掏心所以最开心曾经
But we were the happiest then.

想念最伤心但却最动心的记忆
I'll remember the most heart wrenching, yet touching memories.

PS: Pardon my lousy translation. This is yet another random act by the utterly bored me.

Yet another Monday.

2012-02-06T21:44:00.002+08:00

Not having Monday blues but I feel sick to the core. Still, I went off to work anyway instead of curling up like a hamster in bed. Worth it, I earned another $56, not a lot, but better than $0. ($__$)Y Money-faced me.

1) I can't sleep well without having nightmares.

2) I can't eat 2 bowls of noodles/rice anymore D:

3) I snack at unearthly hours, like midnight =_=

4) I feel like curling up into a fluffy ball every night.

5) I actually feel cold in the morning! Is it just me or the weather's weird?! I have never felt cold in the morning before! Goodness.

I want to feel okay again... :'(

The little things that we should do to keep in touch, but they're often overlooked. :<

On a totally random note, I LOVE THE OFFICE LIFT'S REFLECTIVE MIRRORS! Make me look so skinny wtf. Yeah I wore a sweater/ PJ-like long sleeved shirt bought from Taiwan to work. Can't be bothered to match my outfits. #lazy No motivation to do so too. #truestory

May the rest of this week be pleasant and kind to me. Bless my soul.

And yes. I deserve better.

Traces of you everywhere.

2012-02-03T21:42:00.000+08:00

WARNING. Not suitable for those currently undergoing relationship problems/ have broken up. Will make you cry endlessly. I guarantee. Tears will somehow find their way into your eyes.

I wish, we'll re-connect this valentine's day, is that too much to ask for?

我懂說分手的難處冷靜看著你把話說出
好讓你覺得我沒那麼在乎其實你不說我能感觸
雖然我裝作糊塗 提到她你的眼神已明顯已不再專注

這一路每一步都走得太辛苦愛到不了幸福
是我們沒有認路的天賦她讓我看清楚

這旅途每一步都走得太辛苦 愛終究走到迷途
決定祝福我會算數
就像當初說要愛你給了全部

我懂說分手的難處冷靜看著你把話說出
好讓你覺得我沒那麼在乎其實你不說我能感觸
雖然我裝作糊塗提到她你的眼神已明顯已不再專注

這一路每一步都走得太辛苦愛到不了幸福
是我們沒有認路的天賦她讓我看清楚

這旅途每一步都走得太辛苦愛終究走到迷途
決定祝福我會算數
就像當初說要愛你給了全部

這旅途每一步都走得太辛苦愛到不了幸福
是我們沒有認路的天賦她讓我看清楚

說不哭眼淚卻止不住畢竟曾擁有過你一段路
決定祝福我會算數
就像當初說要愛你給了全部

Belated: What I wore on monday

2012-02-02T21:26:00.000+08:00

I rarely wear skirts/ dresses to work. It's just more comfortable to be in jeans and sneakers.

I am the kind of girl who chooses sneakers over heels/ wedges.

I am the kind of girl who's serious about what she does.

I am the kind of girl who's pragmatic.

I am the kind of girl who seems cold and aloof.

But I am not what I seem to be.
If you didn't bother to find out more, don't comment about me like that. Be nice.

BAD EMOTIONS ASIDE. *throw into the dustbin*

It's great to know that you've friends you can rely on, even when they have a colourful love life (or the absence of it now) and when you're #foreverdestinedtobealoneinyourLDR. Thank god for you girls. <3

Resistance is futile...

2012-01-31T22:52:00.000+08:00

from 9gag.com

Moving on from coding.

2012-01-27T20:56:00.000+08:00

Evelyn and I finished coding the surveys on the friday before CNY.

Suddenly, the wave of realization hit us. OMG WE FINISHED CODING?!?!

We're suppose to be doing it for 2 to 3 months, but the efficient duo i.e. Us finished in a month. Trollollollollol-ed and self-pwned.

BUT, lucky us, someone needed our help to sort out some admin/ paperwork stuff. We were saved for another two days, from the fate of becoming unemployed...

We're finally doing something else other than coding! Yay! (well, to break the seemingly boring repetitive cycle.)

So now we're doing data entry, we sit like this in front of the computer every single freaking day until we finish keying in everything. And we're seated in an isolated corner, me being even more isolated until nobody can see where I am. Wheeee! #foreveraloneinthecorner

Then we realised doing data entry is even faster than coding, especially since we can do it so fast,

THE END.

I don't know what the heck is wrong with me, no idea why I typed such a childish entry. Sigh. My brain cells are degenerating, what's left of it (which isn't a lot to begin with already). I just thought the pictures were cute.

Happy lunar new year!

2012-01-23T00:37:00.000+08:00

新祝福不断，新信息不停，新鲜事不少，新故事不老，新人做新事，新事新气象，新歌和新舞，新潮新风尚，新时代在飞跑，新年你我共醉倒。春节好！

世人都晓春节好，一年到头相聚闹；最是童年忘不掉，新衣新裤新鞋帽；亲朋好友拜年早，红包礼品不会少；祝福送到就是好，幸福安康新年好！

短信把年拜，收到笑颜开；龙年好运来，保准你发财；健康又实在，做人有情怀；亲情友情在；异性更喜爱；祝福都爱戴，保准你乐坏。祝你春节愉快！

点点心意点点情，信息声声传真情，祝福问候送不停，愿你天天好心情，亲情爱情样样行，工作顺心事业成，钞票天天赚不停，一生幸福笑盈盈！

Here are some cute + sweet messages I found when I was making cards for the entire office! Some of them are really funny but office inappropriate so those are the ones meant for my dears :D I also realised that I still have gunikey and bunny's Christmas cards with me!! Well I'm such a major blur queen when it comes to remembering things like this...

But! But! Muddleheaded me saw double rainbows the other day after getting my shoes soaked in rain water! I was just walking and when I looked up I saw the rainbows!

RAINBOWS! I have never seen one in my entire pathetic eighteen years of life and when I do, I saw two at one go! Made me super happy + contented despite being caught in the heavy downpour earlier on! Everything's gonna be awesome this year, I just know it, cause when you've hit rock bottom there's no other way to go except upwards!

Everything is going to be perfect! :D

As usual, with love,

Kangaroo ^_^

Pre-CNY Preparations.

2012-01-20T01:00:00.000+08:00

Part of the huge ass amount of "oranges" I made for the office! These alone took me quite some time to do up nicely, although I still can't make them look round and fat. They look short but fat but it's still cute right? Trollolololol...

A super short entry to end the night! Off to hit the bed!

GOOD NIGHT LOVELIES!

Is being pretty everything?

2012-01-18T19:06:00.001+08:00

English Translation

Oh oh oh ohohoh Oh oh oh
I’m beautiful You’re beautiful

Men are all the same these days
They only like pretty faces
Why is every single guy like that?

Other parts of me are prettier
But they’re not parts that can be seen
And everyone says that I am ugly

I want to be in love now
I want to be obviously in love
I want an honest person

Is being pretty everything?
Do you only look at the outer image?
Please stop now
and look at my heart (look look look)

Am I good-for-nothing?
Am I that unworthy?
That’s so not cool,
look at my heart (look look look)

Oh oh oh ohohoh Oh oh oh
I’m beautiful You’re beautiful

Do pretty faces feed you?
They become the same after a month
Why, why are guys like this?

“It’s always the ugly ones who complain more”
Jerks who say that, please piss off
The outside and inside aren’t always the same

I want to be in love now
I want to be obviously in love
I want a person who will only care for me

Is being pretty everything?
Do you only look at the outer image?
Please stop now
and look at my heart (look look look)

Am I good-for-nothing?
Am I that unworthy?
That’s so not cool,
look at my heart (look look look)

I am the Fat Cat -
are you curious about me?
Do you even know about the scars
you gave me with your toenails?
Look at my eyes,
look at my crying heart
Look at my two eyes
that are waiting for your love

Are you a hotshot?
Are you that much of a hotshot?
That’s so not cool,
look at yourself (look look look)

Is being pretty everything?
Do you only look at the outer image?
Please stop now
and look at my heart (look look look)

Oh oh oh ohohoh Oh oh oh
I’m beautiful You’re beautiful

Awkwardly true...

2012-01-14T11:35:00.000+08:00

So sad but true :X :( :'(

When I was young, I wanted to marry a policeman when I grew up, thanks to the hearty dosage of Hong Kong drama series involving tall, tanned, cute/ handsome cops with impeccable stamina and sense of logic. I always believed that policemen were like this until I grew up and realised I have never in my entire pathetic 16 years of life seen a policeman or two patrolling in my neighbourhood/ my grans neighbourhood! I know what you're thinking but those cool guys in smart uniform and caps patrolling in the MRT stations don't count. I don't think I'd stayed home too often either. :/ So... ://

For you kids out there...

2012-01-13T20:59:00.001+08:00

I was actually youtube-ing: "how to shuffle" when I chanced upon this video. For you people out there taking your PSLE/ N levels/ O levels/ even university exams and you need some motivation to do work, this is the song for you.

Every, everyday I'm studying ~

No more Monday blues

2012-01-09T22:19:00.000+08:00

All the lovely pictures from tumblr.

Don't lose touch

2012-01-08T20:50:00.000+08:00

They always say that people who truly care will try all means to stay in touch with you no matter what happens. But if they don't, does it simply mean that they don't care enough to make the effort to do so?

The weather has been horrible lately. It was radiating heat like there's no tomorrow yesterday and this morning but it suddenly rained in the afternoon (and ruining my mood effective to get out of the house). Luckily the rain stopped when I was suppose to get out. Happy again #easilycontented (LOL).

Gave into the temptation of having dinner outside (and thus spending more money, omg my hard earned money D:) because silly us went to camp at the Kopitiam while waiting for Chooni to finish work. HAHA super fail wth, never wait for someone in an eatery because you'll be tempted to eat! At least for a glutton like me...

Did some catching up at Mcd, sat there shamelessly for quite some time as Gene ate her downsized ice-cream cone. I CAN NOW KNOW SOME SECRETS MUHAHAHA :D Not. Chooni's lips were sealed huh, always trying to digress and divert our attention else where. And I'm not infatuated with anyone at the moment chooni! Don't ask already ~~~

I'm so blessed to be surrounded by positive people who can tolerate my whines. :>

Food is the best thing in the world

2012-01-04T20:00:00.000+08:00

The HOHOHO Sleepover :D

2012-01-01T07:43:00.002+08:00

BACKDATED POST.

PS: HO sounds like the hokkien pronunciation of good. So yeah. ;)

I was being randomly and surprisingly spontaneous when I suggested having a sleepover this year. We're all super busy now (although school, college life to be exact, has ended) working for moolahs. Still, I haven't seen them for about 2 years now. I guess everyone has changed in some way or another, but they are still the people who I care about alot. Love the girls! :D :D :D

Made cards! <3

Iris' favourite hangout place :S

Acting cute, as usual ;)

Being real spontaneous to make the airbed too ^^y

Trying on my clothes.. #likeafashionshow

Whose leg is this?!?! Hahaha.

(Part of) our supper

Unglam much hehe :B

They all love my wardrobe!

Last but not least,

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Secrets.

2011-12-30T22:52:00.000+08:00

I've been reading sixbillionsecrets.

No matter how alone you feel, remember there's always someone out there who feels as lonely as you. Don't give up hope. They always say that tough times don't last, but tough people do. Hang on. Show yourself how strong you can be, even when you're alone.

Cause you gotta have faith in yourself sometimes.

My life is so repetitive.

2011-12-29T22:41:00.001+08:00

Wake up at six thirty.
Bathe, brush my teeth, have breakfast, get out of the house.
Reach the office, get a pancake (usually cheese flavour) and a cup of hot soya milk.
Take Mypaper.
Stroll into the office #likeaboss.
Read the news and have breakfast number 2 in the office #likeaboss.

It's eight thirty.

Start work.
Work.Work.Work.Work.Work.

Lunch.

Work.Work.Work.Work.Work.Work.Work.

Knock off.
Run for the bus.

Reach home at seven.
Cook dinner and watch tv simultaneously.
Go online, visit forums, stalk on fb, kaypo using twitter, listen to a bunch of useless songs, watch some MVs.

Bathe again.Chat on the phone.Sleep.

MERRY CHRISTMAS Y^__^Y

2011-12-25T01:00:00.000+08:00

Imy...

2011-12-22T00:10:00.001+08:00

You know, your name always pops out on the top of my 'friend' name list whenever I press that particular alphabet. Guess that speaks volume about how much I miss you... ...

Navi ft Tablo - I LOVE YOU

2011-12-18T20:07:00.000+08:00

Tmr's monday! Hold on! It'll be a wild ride for the week ahead before the Xmas break :D

Hardcore fangirl-ing

2011-12-17T22:24:00.000+08:00

I know this happened eons ago, but it's so awesome I gotta share it! <3

忍不住，想你了。

Level up!

2011-12-16T22:12:00.002+08:00

I have survived my first work week!!

Never thought I'd be so glad to spend my weekends lazing in bed until 8 am (yes that's a luxury for me) instead of waking up at the usual 6 am so that I can bathe, yadadadadada around and reach office before 8 am to eat breakfast.

One thing I realised is that office life doesn't suit me at all, although I manage to stay desk bound for the entire period of my work session, except to go visit the WC/ refill water. I'ma good girl okay! (Y) I have this compelling sense of anxiety to complete the work (at the pace target I set for myself) and do it perfectly (damn the perfectionist streak in me) but I guess taking a (much needed) break at times will make me more efficient than to do work when I'm tired (that's where all the silly mistakes and illogical stuff comes in).

In conclusion, work is fun because you enjoy what you do (even if you don't you should learn to enjoy it ^__^y yeahhhh) so time passes very quickly (you get paid at the same time too WAHAHAH MOOLAHHHHHH come to mama!!).

You may think that I'm nuts but, I WANT TO WORK MOREEEEE. (and earn more money duhhh).

Hehe. I really want to go on a graduation trip ~ Best to go where my heart is (justttttttttttttt). :D

PROM @SWISSOTEL

2011-12-14T17:59:00.001+08:00

with Class of 2011 :D

Initially I regretted buying the prom tickets, thought I could have spent it else where on some other things (e.g to fund my online shopping oops~) BUT never have I been so glad that I chose to (get myself persuaded by bunneh to) attend Prom. I would've totally regretted not going, so this one's for you bunz! ^^

Genie came over to chill out before prom starts! ^^ We were totally so chilled, when others have already finished their makeup Genie had just started painting her nails (I forced her to lol) while I bathed :S

To not waste our efforts of 1.5 hours of painting our faces (but our makeup was so subtle it pales/ vanish in comparison with the rest's). Still, I think there's a difference before/ after makeup right???

This is "before":

This is "after":

With my awesome sister, what will I do without unnie?!?! ^^

Not much difference/ No difference at all right =_="'

Bunneh!

Rocker (pervy) PW mate.

Choontardddddddd why so pretty ~ ^^

#damnfailshot MY CURLS! :D

#damnfailshot2 JOJO～

Encore pretty gunikey again!

BUNNEHHHHH. Pack me in your luggage please! :(

Shining superstar ~ Hahaha. :D

It was a bitter day.

2011-12-13T20:14:00.000+08:00

A bitter day, it will all get erased like this
It will all be forgotten someday
I might smile when the time comes
But i guess i can’t help it right now
Even though the weather is great, my mood is not

I think you’re teasing me, and i get mad
I struggle because of these situations i can’t handle
The exact opposite of me, the world continues spinning as if nothing happened
You were living just fine
It’s not fair, this is unfair
People who look at me while passing by pity me
nothing goes right

I missed the place where i was supposed to get off at this morning
because i suddenly thought of you, i got off at a lonesome station
because it seemed lonely today of all days, tears just kept falling
i walked for a long time like that
i miss you, who i’ve been only hating, yet again
because the days when i was weak with no strength to hold onto you were so pathetic
a bitter day, it will all get erased like this
it will all be forgotten someday
i might smile when the time comes
but i guess i can’t help it right now
i can’t do anything
even though i’m sad because i’m thinking of you again right now
even though it will be difficult, i’ll keep trying to erase you

no matter what i say, it will sound like an excuse
even if i say that all of this was for you
because you were too good for me
because i was uncomfortable as if i were wearing clothes that didn’t match me
you’re beautiful, but you withered away from me
how do you think i felt while looking at that?
we should have just never started
i shouldn’t have looked into your eyes that first time
i thought i would be carefree once i let you go, but that wasn’t the case
my mind understands that we’ve separated
but my heart doesn’t want to accept it
missing you and trying to erase you, it repeats every day

i’ll be the one to take all the pain
i’d like it if you were just happy
so that the choice i make now doesn’t go to waste
so that i don’t regret it
i’ll always pray for you
a bitter day, it will all get erased like this
it will all be forgotten someday
i might smile when the time comes
but i guess i can’t help it right now
i can’t do anything
even though i’m sad because i’m thinking of you again right now
even though it will be difficult, i’ll keep trying to erase you
it’ll be forgotten little by little

when time passes, i’ll be able to smile and reminisce
instead of that common saying that time heals everything
tell me something that actually works
you can receive so much more love than what you got from me
you’re as beautiful as ever
you said we’d be together forever
in the end, we’re the same as others
a bitter day, it will all get erased like this
it will all be forgotten someday
that day will come

I want to sing KTV.

2011-12-11T18:01:00.000+08:00

Like now. :/

沒有想法　

有想法又能怎樣

只能寫部落格整晚

幾個流言安慰不了　

心裡的遺憾

沒有負擔　

原來也是種負擔

自由多得讓人心慌
你羡慕我　

那要不要跟我交換?

리쌍 - Turned off the TV

2011-12-05T11:27:00.001+08:00

(feat. Tasha, Kwon Jungyeol OF 10CM)

This is such a cute MV! ^___^(y)

The Ideal Job.

2011-12-02T16:20:00.000+08:00

It makes me wonder, how many people can actually find a work that they feel is 'great', or actually like what they are doing?

Post-As.

I honestly don't feel any significant difference. I don't know what my passion is (yet), I don't know what I want, I don't even know where I'm heading. I've got a rough idea but that's not good enough to take me anywhere. There's no sense of direction, just feeling, lost. The things that used to bother me don't anymore. I suppose that's good. But this feeling of 'not caring about anything anymore' scares me. I used to enjoy shopping so much, but now, I just don't feel the same joy I once felt when I receive a parcel or buy something that I once coveted after. I don't feel like dressing up to head out. I don't feel like going out to socialise, don't feel like reading, using the com is sucha bore too... Ranting seems... Idk, meaningless? (but ironically i'm sorta ranting now).

I guess I'll have to force myself out of the house. After all, I've one pitiful month left before my student pass expires and I want to surround myself with positive energy that I once had (and am going to regain). I've got myself a holiday job that should last for my (almost) entire holiday starting from Jan, a 8.30 to 5.30 job. I've got potential tutees who are interested (means I'll go back to hugging my book everyday, yay).

So there, we'll lose our sense of direction at times, but it shouldn't be enough to discourage us from orientating ourselves to operate better again. :)

I'll be fine. I'm strong enough to face what's coming up.

2011-12-01T22:17:00.000+08:00

Remember December (last year's)?

I feel a separation coming on
'Cause I know you want to be moving on
I wish it would snow tonight
You'd pull me in, avoid a fight
'Cause I feel a separation coming on
Just prove that there is nothing left to try
'Cause the truth I'd rather we just both deny
You kissed me with those open eyes
It says so much, it's no surprise to you
But I've got something left inside

Don't surrender, surrender, surrender
Please remember, remember December
We were so in love back then
Now you're listening to what they say, don't go that way
Remember, remember December
Please remember, don't surrender
You said you wouldn't let them change your mind
'Cause when we're together fire melts the ice
Our hearts are both on overdrive
Come with me, let's run tonight
Don't let these memories get left behind
Don't surrender, surrender, surrender
Please remember, remember December
We were so in love back then
Now you're listening to what they say, don't go that way
Remember, remember December
Please remember

I remember us together with a promise of forever
We can do this, fight the pressure
Please remember December
Don't surrender, surrender, surrender
Please remember, remember December
We were so in love back then
Now you're listening to what they say, don't go that way
Remember, remember December
Please remember, don't surrender

--------------------------------

Why fairytale like endings don't happen to you.

A) You're not pretty
B) You're not cute
C) You're not skinny (enough, by society's standards *rolleyes*)
D) All of the above

You don't know you're beautiful

2011-11-26T22:00:00.000+08:00

SHUCKS LA I got carried away with rotting for so many days.

I wasn't actually rotting away, rather, busy sending resumes and hoping for someone to hire me so that I can earn some money to go backpacking with my dears later/ save the money as part of my university fund. The latter sounds better. Sigh.

I think I've more or less decided on what I want to study in university. The sole question that reminds is WHERE.

Still me. Boring me.

2011-11-24T13:05:00.000+08:00

I still look pretty much the same.

In 2006.

The first attempt at camwhoring when Janelle came to sleepoverz and I was bored. This was my friendster picture!! LOL. I had less hair last time cause I 'layered' it? Popular hairstyle for lian-wannabes then. What's with the act cute face omg (dies a million times inside). And my eye bags?!?!?!

In 2007.

- speechless -

I must have been reallyyyyyyyy bored that day. -_- But hey! My eye bags aren't so bad anymore!!

In 2008.

I was in my Japan girl wannabe phrase. Had shoulder length hair and nasty thick bangs. Dotssssssssss. This was my blog picture! OMG. Lousy phone cam with 1.0 MB only. HEY! No eye bags!!!

In 2009.

I look damn fair like this, must post LOL. After leaving badminton, I didn't have to go under the sun that often thus I become less tanned + the toliet lighting was really good hahaha! 8D No eye bags too!!! Good old days after the O levels... ;D

BUT! Attack of the fat cheeks!! Sobzzzzz. ://

In early 2010.

Class chalet? I should think so. :)) Grew my hair longerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Started smiling with teeth! :P Put on braces!

2011.

It just says I need sleep. LOL.

【那些年，我們一起追的女孩】

2011-11-21T23:09:00.000+08:00

電影主題曲《那些年》
演唱：胡夏／作曲：木村充利／作詞：九把刀

又回到最初的起點
記憶中妳青澀的臉
我們終於來到了這一天
桌墊下的老照片
無數回憶連結
今天男孩要赴女孩最後的約

又回到最初的起點
呆呆地站在鏡子前
笨拙繫上紅色領帶的結
將頭髮梳成大人模樣
穿上一身帥氣西裝
等會兒見妳一定比想像美

好想再回到那些年的時光
回到教室座位前後　故意討妳溫柔的罵
黑板上排列組合　妳捨得解開嗎
誰與誰坐他又愛著她

那些年錯過的大雨
那些年錯過的愛情
好想擁抱妳　擁抱錯過的勇氣
曾經想征服全世界
到最後回首才發現
這世界滴滴點點全部都是妳

那些年錯過的大雨
那些年錯過的愛情
好想告訴妳　告訴妳我沒有忘記
那天晚上滿天星星
平行時空下的約定
再一次相遇我會緊緊抱著妳
緊緊抱著妳

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

這些回憶我從來都沒有遺忘過，我只是把它們放在心中的一個角落裡，一直靜靜的保存著。

回憶中的「遺憾」怎麼都總是特別讓人心痛。。。

&I will always love you

2011-11-19T09:21:00.000+08:00

Time heals all wounds.
Wounds leaves obvious scars.
And scars evoke memories.

How can you say that with time, all those memories we had would fade away?

You're just lying to make your conscious feel better.
And me, you're just trying to fool me, for the one last time.

PUSH ON.

2011-11-12T13:33:00.000+08:00

Trying to be funny... It's not funny actually.

#nerdjokes

想自由

2011-11-10T17:13:00.006+08:00

By 林宥嘉 Yoga

想自由 = want to be free.

向前走

我不回頭

別再讓回憶給絆倒了

我會微笑的

至少我等著有一天我們會自由的

I'll march on.
I won't look back.
I'll smile.
I'll wait for the day that we'll be free.

We're going to be free. I can smell it! ^^

2011-11-09T16:23:00.000+08:00

I'm BOM-BIASED!

2011-11-03T22:13:00.009+08:00

指望

2011-10-30T21:15:00.000+08:00

怕不怕被拒绝 ?
怕不怕被省略?
你怕不怕被沦落在宿命中妥协?
当真爱宣告从缺 , 骄傲的玫瑰正一片一片枯萎
尽管你抱歉忏悔, 真心一旦坠跌就不能飞... ...

别指望我谅解 , 别指望我体会
爱不是点头就能挽回.
快乐或伤悲没什麽分别
心碎到终点会迎刃而解

别指望我谅解, 别指望我体会
爱不是注定要填你的缺
太多的是非来不及杜绝
更不想依恋这残缺的美
残缺的迂回

I did that because I could see your pain.
But you were oblivious to mine.

Determination will get you through this.

2011-10-28T22:46:00.003+08:00

The truth is, you don't need to be smart to get you through your 'A's.

You need a hell lot of

DETERMINATION.

Studying gives you bad skin and dark eye circles with complimentary eye bags. GAWDDDDDDD! D: That's me. In case you forgot... LOL.

Tired.

2011-10-26T21:26:00.005+08:00

So we've heard of the story of how the tortoise outrun the rabbit.

I shall be that tortoise. It's an indisputable assumption.

It doesn't matter if you come in first (actually it does, duhhh.)
It matters more that you finish with your personal best.

I will surviveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

My god. Where's my sanity!

Super cheery song! :D

2011-10-23T23:11:00.001+08:00

OKAY. Stop staring at weird places. I caught you, didn't I?!

I want her red studded sneakers! So prettayyyyyyy! ^^

Lemming! I'm attempting to exercise but doing random dance moves to the song. Gah. DO NOT GAIN WEIGHT! I don't want to buy new jeans! :(((((( I've no money to too! :(((((((

2011-10-17T12:59:00.000+08:00

Hurhur.

I think it's funny.

My sense of humour is approaching zero now.

(HAHAHA! GET IT?!?!)

Fml.

-____________-

Never a right time to say goodbye.

2011-10-15T17:54:00.002+08:00

Look we gotta talk
Dang I know
I know it's just
It's just...
Some things I gotta get of my chest alright....

Yeahhhh...
Whoa, whoa, whoa, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, oh, whoa...
Listen..

Baby come here and sit down, let's talk
I got a lot to say so I guess I'll start by
Saying that I love you,
But you know, this thing ain't been
No walk in the park for us
I swear it'll only take a minute
You'll understand when I finish, yeah
And I don't wanna see you cry
But I don't wanna be the one
to tell you a lie so

How do you let it go? When you,
You just don't know? What's on,
The other side of the door
When you're walking out, talk about it
Everything I tried to remember to say
Just went out my head
So I'ma do the best I can
to get you to understand
'cause I know

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way
I once felt about you
Girl it's not you, it's me
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)

There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

Girl I know your heart is breaking
And a thousand times I
Found myself asking, "Why? Why?"
Why am I taking so long to say this?
But trust me, girl I never
Meant to crush your world
And I never
Thought I would see the day we grew apart
And I wanna know

How do you let it go? When you,
You just don't know? What's on,
The other side of the door
When you're walking out, talk about it
Everything I tried to remember to say
Just went out my head
So I'ma do the best I can
to get you to understand
'cause I know

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way
I once felt about you
Girl it's not you, it's me
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)

There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

Listen to your heart
Girl you know,
We should be apart, baby I
I just can't do it
I, I just can't do it

Listen to your heart
Girl you know,
We should be apart, baby I
I just can't do it
And sometimes it makes me wanna cry
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Do you hear me crying?
Oh, oh, oh
There's never a right time

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way
I once felt about you
Girl it's not you, it's me
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)

There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

[Chorus]
There's never a right time to say goodbye
But I gotta make the first move
'Cause if I don't you gonna start hating me
Cause I really don't feel the way
I once felt about you
Girl it's not you, it's me
I kinda gotta figure out what I need (oh)

There's never a right time to say goodbye
But we know that we gotta go
Our separate ways
And I know it's hard but I gotta do it,
And it's killing me
Cause there's never a right time
Right time to say goodbye

2011-10-11T21:44:00.000+08:00

Some kind blackjack complied this... 2NE1's potential US debut song! :D

One of the many late night suppers

2011-10-08T09:30:00.000+08:00

I'm amazed at even myself at my ability to pig on junk food... Pure calories!

After sleeping early (AT FREAKING 8 PM! First time in my JC life lollllz) yesterday night, I felt recharged and ready to attack my work. I've to get this right. There are no second chances in life (in saying so, I'm making a hasty generalisation).

And it's a red herring (very fishy) when I typed the above lines that are totally in no way related to the pictures shown above (or supposedly so). Do you feel like smacking me nao?!?! I just drowned myself in the Great Planet of Great Pleasure ~~~ 8D

And I am not making any sense!!

Okay...
I'm going to recharge by babysitting or something. My cousins are flying to Thailand tmr... PACK ME IN YOUR LUGGAGE!!!

I'm stuck on a little red dot. STUCK. STUCKKKKKK. *whines*

Gah! My homemade Mcd inspired hotcakes (success!) are calling out to me to devour them. (LOL)

Till next time when I have my sanity back... BYE!

To trust or not to trust.

2011-10-06T21:35:00.003+08:00

I don't wanna see you cry.
I don't wanna be there when you tell me a lie so,
Just let it go,
Can you?

对自己的表现失望是难免的

付出了这么多

却得不到相同的回报

会害怕会恐惧

好不容易建立起来的信心渐渐被摧毁... ...

但也有失望

哭了累了发泄了

就应该重新站起来了

我们可以休息但是不可以放弃!!

放弃就真的什么机会都没有了... ...

加油

最后一次相信付出 = 回报

Nutrients for the eyes!

2011-10-04T00:23:00.000+08:00

林更新！！：）

Handsome a not?!?! :D

Believe me, eyecandies can make you very very very happy. Hurhur. And it's more affordable than shopping! :P I've been shopping (online) way too much. Gotta curb my spendings! If not I reckon I'll have to live on bread for the next month or two if this madness goes on without being restrained. Oh well. I'm really stressed, I have to vent it out somehow. Else I'd go mad, honest.

2011-10-03T22:36:00.000+08:00

I'm still suffering from post-bbjx syndrome. OMG. I must not start watching any other drama now. Or rather, I can't bring myself to watch anything now. This drama is so freaking awesome the rest pale in comparison T____T

多一步的擦肩，就步步沦陷。。。
明知是祸为何还不知所措？

结局好虐哦，每次想到它也会跟着心痛。

突然想看你的脸，熟悉的感觉。
放不下也忘不掉。。。

it's Friday

2011-09-30T23:00:00.000+08:00

Where did we go wrong?
Our love was like so strong.
Don't forget.

Please, don't take me for granted.

I don't know how I'm gonna do this, but I just need you now.

I'm so addicted to you.

2011-09-28T19:45:00.003+08:00

Slowly but surely, I'll kick my addiction to you.

Slowly but surely. :)

I'm not lovesick. Justttttttt wanted to whine a little.

Teehee! I'm done! XD

(Un)written rules of the world.

2011-09-25T00:30:00.000+08:00

You and your lies.

2011-09-24T09:56:00.000+08:00

MV's so pretty! :D Gotta prepare to go out alr ^^

Nothing but pain.

2011-09-22T21:13:00.011+08:00

It's not worth my pain. But I can't blame anyone. It was ultimately my own choice. The recurring pain is a constant reminder. Constant pain.

I might have ran excessively these days, by accident. Once I start running, I can't seem to stop. To continue running as if all the deadlines were chasing behind me. Too much, is always not a good thing. Unless it's mugging of course. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.

Have.
To.
Stop.
Running.

I feel so utterly bitter and broken. I hug myself alot more these days, fold my arms like some emo kid. I speak so much rubbish. I'm so afraid that if I didn't do that, I'd disintegrate and lose composure. I'm afraid I'll start crying. Especially after chem paper. Idk, the subject which I spend the most time is ironically the subject that I screw up the most. The more I study, the more insecure I become.

听秋风　吹起遍地叶落
萧瑟之中　回荡沉默问候
才疯过　在那荒凉战业之中　
曾留下些什麼

朦胧中却听见　遥远的天边
歌颂著爱恋
穿越云雾的月　你给的从前
千年以前的心碎

泪狂奔不悔　冻结所有思念阵雨在蔓延　浇灭谁的誓言
回首尽是叹　盼的我都忘了伤
还在我身上狂妄
不后悔爱的疯狂...

2011-09-19T22:28:00.008+08:00

Vainpot.

Lemmingggggggggggg!

步步惊心

2011-09-18T13:10:00.002+08:00

Latest drama craze :D

作为一个朝九晚五的普通白领，除了模样长得挺招人喜爱，现年二十多岁的张晓和周围其他忙忙碌碌的都市人基本没什么区别。张晓谈过几次无疾而终的恋爱，谈不上深刻却也对她有点影响。做着一份不喜爱也不讨厌的工作，为了薪水再多一些位置再高一些，她也能整天乐呵呵地投入到与战争一样残酷的职场斗争中去。她按部就班地计划着自己的未来的人生——房子，旅游，恋爱。

在张晓的前半生里，无论她做的还是她想的，几乎都与普通人一样，为了更好的生活奋斗着，乐此不疲。但张晓的内心总有着一种牵动，她自己也说不出个名堂来，只觉得冥冥之中，似乎还存在着另一种生活……

那一天，张晓的命运被一场车祸彻底改写。她眼看着那辆失控的卡车将自己的灵魂撞出了躯体，而她，既没有进医院也没有进天堂，却是被撞进了清朝的宫廷中。就像铺天盖地的小说里写的那样，张晓的灵魂跨过时间的隧道，在一个叫马尔泰.若曦的十六岁清朝女孩的体内，重生了……

时年，康熙第四十三。天下太平，但一场震动历史的“九龙夺嫡”正在暗潮涌动。权利的厮杀，爱情的灼烧，在被无限放大的历史舞台上，张晓，不，是马尔泰?若曦的命运无可避免的与众位亲王阿哥们交织在一起……
她知道自己不该卷入这场九王夺嫡的争斗中，可心不由己，因为这里有她所爱的，也有爱着她的……

若曦最后选择的究竟是温润如玉的八阿哥，还是面冷心热的四阿哥，又或是出人意料的其他人? 等历史的风云过后，可以陪她看夕阳西下、云卷云舒的又将是谁？

2011-09-17T22:46:00.029+08:00

Maybe it's just me

All the 'what if's.

ruined by education

2011-09-13T22:20:00.032+08:00

I think the smiley is a good representation of my facial expression now. We are being educated. We are receiving an education. But what does an education mean? I went to google (brillant use of technology XD) some quotes from some famous people. OMG. This sounds so GP-ish. I've bolded some which imho are pretty interesting. :)

Horace Mann: A human being is not attaining his full heights until he is educated.

Russell Baker: An educated person is one who has learned that information almost always turns out to be at best incomplete and very often false, misleading, fictitious, mendacious - just dead wrong.

Anatole France: An education isn't how much you have committed to memory, or even how much you know. It's being able to differentiate between what you know and what you don't.

Will Durant :Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance.

Oscar Wilde: Education is an admirable thing, but it is well to remember from time to time that nothing that is worth knowing can be taught.

Daniel J. Boorstin: Education is learning what you didn't even know you didn't know.

Aristotle: The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet.

Ernest Renan: The simplest schoolboy is now familiar with truths for which Archimedes would have sacrificed his life.

Sydney J. Harris: The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows.

Victor Hugo: He who opens a school door, closes a prison. Walt Disney: I would rather entertain and hope that people learned something than educate people and hope they were entertained.

Heinrich Heine: If the Romans had been obliged to learn Latin, they would never have found time to conquer the world.

Abigail Adams: Learning is not attained by chance, it must be sought for with ardor and diligence.

Ezra Pound: Real education must ultimately be limited to men who insist on knowing, the rest is mere sheep-herding.

This is the quote which I liked best. It makes alot of sense, doesn't it? :D

Abu Bakr: If an ignorant person is attracted by the things of the world, that is bad. But if a learned person is thus attracted, it is worse.

And finally,

Albert Einstein: The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.

"Do you agree?"

God bless.

2011-09-11T20:18:00.000+08:00

For those who died in the 911 attacks.

Pray.

2011-09-09T11:38:00.014+08:00

Anxiety attack

And then I eat more to counter the stress.
Then I get fat.

FML.

I'm trapped in my own homemade prison.
You can call up everyone, but nobody's gonna pick up the phone.
Erratic sleeping patterns and studying habits, that's why.
Baby you'll have to suck it up and be strong. Be strong.

I only have 2 feet.

2011-09-06T21:40:00.004+08:00

Shoes! Shoes! I want them I need them!

Since my wardrobe is exploding, I shall focus on other areas available for moi to collect things. Hehe! Omg my bank acc is bleeding like nobodys business. :ppp I'm much much much happier now than before! Guess there's just someone about school that turns me off straight away, or maybe that sentiment diffused over from geneeeee. God I haven't start on gene related stuffs yet. Oh well. But I'll get it done somehow.

Yes I'm fucking superficial! Because there's so little to look forward to now. Everyone's so caught up in their own filter bubbles. Pop! This is reality man. Like it or not :(((

Dress up! Believe it or not, you can actually gain confidence from that, provided that you wear stuff that suits your personality and body type luh. No point trying to squeeze into that uber small jeans you had eons ago. Trust me, I learnt it the hard way :(((

Well... Presenting, shoes! :DDD

Absolutely lemming for these shoes. I love heels. I realised that my preference is pretty simple/ small detailings when it comes to heels. Guess I prefer attention on my clothes LOL. I love all of them! Especially the wedges! Which girl doesn't, honestly. Heels always gives a more polished feel, makes you look taller (an advantage which I don't need/ want ://), elongates your legs endlessly (I need this!! :D).

I'm so afraid of buying heels cause I can't bear the wtf looks given especially when I'm on the bus/ mrt. :( Sigh. But seeing others wear them makes me want a pair for myself too!

Sheesh! I know I should be studying BUT, shoes de-stress me okay! ;(

Nights! :D
Sleep early ~~to grow taller!~~ to prevent looking like a panda the next day! :D

Working hard!

2011-09-02T00:03:00.004+08:00

xoxo,

2011-08-31T21:46:00.027+08:00

What's life without music?
Random train of thoughts.
Incoherent. There's not much link there.

因為絕望所以學會祈求
我也不想讓心痛對我欲取欲求
我在黑暗之中尋找幸福的下落
等待原來那顆流星劃過我天空
總要在說完再見以後才開始明白愛多濃
今晚你想念的人是不是我

想要愛到最後的最後
想要和你再一次牽手

我想念的人會不會懂....

We'll only realise what we've lost when it's gone.
Tonight, I won't be the one you're missing.
My fault. I let you go.
But I'm regretting it.
I want to undo everything from the start. But, it's too late.

Only gonna break break your heart.
Told ya right from the start.

So goodbye baby, goodbye.

On a side note,

2011-08-28T21:51:00.010+08:00

Craving for...

Happy cake!

Do you feel hungry now! :D

We can't please everyone.
We live in our own filter bubbles, whining, doing nothing constructive.
I am just as tired as you are.
I dont know I'm standing for anymore. I just dont.

But I will still try.

2011-08-25T00:57:00.005+08:00

天降大任于斯人也，
必先苦其心志，劳其筋骨，饿其体肤，空乏其身，
行指乱其所为，所以动心忍性，曾益其所不能。

——《孟子》

2011-08-22T23:09:00.006+08:00

내가제일잘나가!

내가제일잘나가!!

내가제일잘나가!!!

I am the best, awfully cute chipmunk version! :D
It has the amazing ability to cheer me up even in the worst mornings. :)

We don't need reminders of how freaking screwed up we are. It's not like we don't want to do well, get good grades and go on to some awesome university with some sort of scholarship that we can bloody be proud of to flaunt to the rest of the universe. It's not. We want to ace it too. In case no one realises, we feel like a bunch of screwed up delinquents. Stop accusing. It's a tedious journey. But still, with so much love and hope (ironic), we'll get there eventually.

PLEASE STOP VERBALLY HURTING US.

In case you haven't realise, we're humans too, just as much as you are. It isn't helping. Please.

I BEG YOU. Stop. :'(

Escape this nonsense.

2011-08-19T22:18:00.013+08:00

I wanna live on a mountain.

Not really actually. I just want to go somewhere with a good view. Somewhere high up, even though I'm afraid of heights. People living on the ground level are so bloody scary. So many stalkers + weirdos. I want to stay away. Somewhere far away, where no one knows who I am, where no stalker can continue to stalk me.

As I'm typing this, I'm very very very angry. Do not continue reading. There's an angry post below. Fuming kangaroo ahead. Be afraid. Very, very afraid.

--------------------------

到了这个时候我都不知道该说什么

生气吗?

不你不值得我生气

害怕吗?

不你的手段我们都清楚你已经没有牌打了

讨厌吗?

不本来就不喜欢哪儿来的讨厌

从开始的 "烦" 到 "厌烦 , 厌恶" 到最后只觉得你太可悲了

只会装可怜装委屈

你还会装什么

够了

真的

你瞪够了吗

牢记我们的一举一动了吗

整天鬼鬼祟祟跟在我们后面

想偷听我们说有的没的

这能给你什么满足感吗?

没人理你也是我们的错哦

我们凭良心说我们根本就没向别人说你的是非

常常以 "性格不合" 为理由草草敷衍别人

我们忍

可是做人不能这么过分

你已经越界很久了

拜托别这么幼稚

2011-08-17T16:42:00.016+08:00

Halfway through the week!

It's tough. But don't lose hope! I can do this! If you don't believe you can, you can never do it. The worse thing about losing is not losing itself, but the way you gave up and say "I can't do this any more". Keep going! Stressed! They keep throwing us work to do, I can't squeeze in enough time to revise everything!

I am not going to be overwhelmed by all the work!
Yeah! (y)

2011-08-15T20:22:00.014+08:00

You can't buy happiness.

But you can buy ice cream!
Or mochi! :D

What's better than some yummy food to ~~console a broken heart~~ kick the monday blues away?! #justsayin. the atmosphere is really apt. Eating ice cream (mochi!!), listening to sentimental songs and watching tv. I suspect watching Korean dramas made me more susceptible to tears even towards the slightest thing. I, well, used to be more hardhearted. Booooo. But the dramas are soooo good. A temporary escape from reality.

My second refuge :)

-------
Can't turn on the tv without something that'll remind me.
But I'll be okay.
So I thought I couldn't live without chu.
I didn't know where to turn to.

2011-08-12T23:11:00.005+08:00

Truth exposed on a Friday night.

In every book, there’s this girl, and this boy.
They fall in love; they don’t want to admit it.
They go out; they love to be together.
They get in a fight, being apart tears them to pieces, they confess true love; they’ve never been happier.

How come authors never tell the truth?

...............................................................................................

It has been exactly x months since this whole thing started. I've spent y hours thinking about you, seeing you thrice in my zzz. Totally wtf. I tried and I tried to get you out of my mind. I really did. But it doesn't get better. Missing you became easier as each day goes by. The little little things that remind me of you, like the silly song or a certain keyword. So many things to constantly remind me. Wish I could press rewind, rewrite certain lines. I won't be ice-cold anymore. I'll respond. I'll go and play basketball with you. I'll race against you, even when I'm not so fit so you'll slow down to match my pace.

PS I'm still not over you.

But you've moved on, haven't you? So I promise myself tonight's gonna be the last night I miss you. I've got to move on and go my own way too.

Cheers, to letting go of something I never really once had.
Well, then again, we always want to have something that we don't/ can't have.
Rebel, rebel.

On a side note, my memories are getting worse these few days. I can't seem to remember what I do/ say. Tsk tsk. I even forgot that I finished my correlation tut way before Mrs Tam went thru it (BEAMS BRIGHTLY). Major accomplishment! ^^ Alright, but the downside is I forgot how I did it alr. -_-

Oh, and it's 11.11. Make a wish ;)

You are, a millon miles away.

我们的故事
就在这里写下句号

2011-08-09T21:59:00.001+08:00

Love;

Makes the world go round.

#justsaying

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY! :D
HAPPY STUDYING FOR TESTS! -kena slapped a thousand times-

Kekeke, I'm exceptionally high after going out, might post some pictures later if I can finish revising my work :))

2011-08-08T17:21:00.002+08:00

Sarah ho/ huaimin's no. 1 fan!!! XD

OMG and my first ever green dress has just arrived. Hope I didn't gain too much weight! HEHE!

2011-08-05T19:24:00.001+08:00

Friday's cooking session!

I'm going to do my best to produce something similar to those above. They look so cute and yummy eh! Looking at them makes me drool all over my keypad wth o_o

Sometimes we need an avenue for escaping. The smell of food makes me happy and less moody. Sometimes, we may be overwhelmed by things, we lose hope, we lose confidence, we become fearful. At times like these, we need inspiration. Even more so now when there are so manynvoices telling us that we're so stupid. Prove them all wrong.

我從十一樓跳下去

http://www.wretch.cc/blog/lux542/24266697

It's a very interesting comic, written in mandarin though. :) personally find it very inspiring. :) why compare what we don't have with what they have? Life isn't fair and will never be fair.

Btw, it's the seventh month now. I appear to be more susceptible to dirty things during this month. I'm gonna run home like a mad kangaroo (jump, rather) everyday. My legs are getting toner with all these exercises. Bunny and gunikeys too. I have awesome friends, even in jc. Awwwwwww. Thanks girls! What will I do without you two bodyguards. Heh.

I'm going to pray this weekend. Hope all things unpleasant shoo far far away from me. Tyvm.

2011-08-02T16:14:00.030+08:00

I wanna be pretty.

Don't lie to me, cause I know.

I just know.

BELATED POST ALERT! :B

2NE1 has always been my major love! :D I refused to sleep before I listened to their new song, UGLY before I sleep. Hehe. I think I'm pleasantly surprised by the theme of the song and its style! It's even better than lonely, I am the best and honestly, I think most girls can relate to this very well! My brother hates this song though *bashes him up*. I think it's difficult for guys to relate to this song. Well, well ~ He prefers SNSD I guess. Girls with attitude scares him off XD

Yup. Who doesn't want to be that 'popular' girl who's pretty, skinny, smart, sporty and seemingly perfect? It's something girls always desire, deep down inside, secretly. So this song is for the girl with insecurities but fakes her confidence; for the girl with self-esteem issues cause her looks 'ain't good enough'; for the girl with body image issues cause she's not skinny enough for this society; for the girl who's branded nerdy and deemed unattractive; for all the girls who can relate to this song. I don't know about you, but I can.

CL] I’m trying to smile brightly but
I don’t like it
I’m not pretty, I’m not beautiful
Oh oh oh oh x 2

[BOM] I’m trying to sing but
No one is listening
I’m not pretty, I’m not beautiful
Oh oh oh oh x 2

[DARA] Why am I this ugly
What must I do for me to be able to smile brightly like you?

[MINJI] I’m getting angry again, why can’t I ever be perfect
I simply put the blame on my ugly appearance in this broken mirror

[BOM] Don’t look at me, I hate this feeling right now
I want to hide away somewhere, I want to escape
This world is full of lies

[CL] I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face tellin’ me I’m pretty

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face cuz I know I’m ugly

[MINJI] Don’t tell me that you can understand me so easily
My ugly and crooked heart may even come to resent you

[BOM] Don’t force me to talk, I’m not right for you
The cold thorns inside that patronizing gaze suffocate me

[MINJI] Don’t come closer, I don’t even want your concern
I want to leave away to somewhere, I want to shout out
This world is full of lies

[CL] I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face tellin’ me I’m pretty

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face cuz I know I’m ugly

[DARA] All alone
I’m all alone x 2

There is no such thing as warmth
There is no one by my side

All alone
I’m all alone x 2
I’m always alone

There’s no such thing as warmth
Next to my side, there’s not even anyone to embrace me

[CL] I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be prety
Don’t lie to my face tellin’ me I’m pretty

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face cuz I know I’m ugly

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hangul Lyrics

Credits: allfordrama.com + softgirlyrics

밝게 웃어보지만
내 맘에 들지 않아
난 예쁘지 않아 아름답지 않아
Oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh

노랠 불러보지만
아무도 듣지 않아
난 예쁘지 않아 아름답지 않아
Oh oh oh oh
Oh oh oh oh

난 왜 이렇게 못난 걸까
어떡하면 나도 너처럼 환하게 웃어볼 수 있을까
또 화가나 왜 늘 완벽하지 못해
이 깨진 거울 속 못난 모습을 향해 탓하기만 해

쳐다보지마 지금 이 느낌이 싫어 난
어디론가 숨고만 싶어 벗어 나고 싶어
이 세상은 거짓말

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face tellin’ me I’m pretty

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face cuz I know I’m ugly

날 쉽게 이해한다고 하지마
못 생기고 삐뚤어진 내 마음이 널 원망할지도 몰라
말 시키지마 난 너와 어울리지 못해
그 잘난 눈빛 속 차가운 가식이 날 숨막히게 해

다가오지마 너의 관심조차 싫어 난
어디론가 떠나고 싶어 소리 치고 싶어
이 세상은 거짓말

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face tellin’ me I’m pretty

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face cuz I know I’m ugly

All alone I’m all alone
All alone I’m all alone
따뜻함이란 없어
곁엔 아무도 없어

All alone I’m all alone
All alone I’m all alone
I’m always all alone
따뜻함이란 없어
곁엔 그 누구도 날 안아줄 사람 없어

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face tellin’ me I’m pretty

I think I’m ugly
And nobody wants to love me
Just like her I wanna be pretty I wanna be pretty
Don’t lie to my face cuz I know I’m ugly

2011-07-30T00:34:00.000+08:00

Why you should sleep early.

Especially on Saturday nights. Omo.
I was doing chemistry while listening to mp3 when I should be sleeping (already). While reading organic chem, this song started playing.

"I'm only gonna break break your break break your heart."

FML. Seriously. -__-

Made me awfully irritated with the biggest WTF moment of my life. And this is not the first time it has happened. IS THIS DESTINY THEN?!?! D: D: D:
No! I don't believe this! I'm going to seduce chem and then break it apart after the 'A's. Grrrrr. Fml i sound like a mugger.

Maybe I am - mugger in the making, do not disturb

2011-07-27T01:19:00.002+08:00

It's a quater after one.
I'm all alone and I miss you now.

So many things to say.
So many things to do.
If only I could turn back the hands of time.

-slaps self-

Insomnia sucks. I need to sleep now so that I won't fall asleep tmr, a damn long day with four and a half hours straight of lessons before there's finally a break to save the strangled soul and starving tummies. I can do this baby. When you think your life sucks, be grateful. There's bound to be someone out there who has it harder than you.

I'm going to listen to Yoga Lin's songs and hope sleep'll come soon. Hurry, to lalaland. :)

2011-07-23T10:09:00.013+08:00

Awesome saturday to go and play badminton. To do what I love the most, even though my skills may have decomposed beyond recognition, but at least, it's something I will enjoy doing for as long as my hip allows me to. The feeling of perspiration dripping is like no other. I haven't moved my lazy ass in a long while. This is going to mark the start. I'm going to exercise i.e. play badminton as often as I can and am allowed to. That's true love baby, true love :D

I need to exercise for at least 3 hours before I feel the endophines working their magic. Says pretty much about how moody I am these days. I sound super self-centred, and am probably am. Just let me vent my frustrations. I swear I'll go mad otherwise. Maybe I'm already mad -_-

Tata.

2011-07-21T17:17:00.001+08:00

POST BLOCKS MOOD.

This is so belated, but...

I'm left with nothing but sighs.
I feel so empty and hollow.
Who doesn't want to do well?

繁华似梦一场空，世事无常何去从？
真的，假的，累了所以不去猜了。
好了，算了，别去在意了。
伤了，痛了，所以不想理了。
可是，为什么还是那么疼呢？

I keep sleeping for extended periods of time. Eight, ten, twelve, fourteen hours. At the end, I still feel fucking tired and screwed up. Irony.

They all think that she's so lucky, that one lucky girl.

But if she's truely fortunate, how come those tears come falling down at night?

♥ A Kangaroo's Diary [袋鼠的日記]

Packed my wardrobe!

Down with flu :/

What's done so far.

What you want and what you have.

Moving on.

Er, so, I am alive.

Come tomorrow.

Supper

变形计 (deformation)

I'm singing my blues

My personal miracles.

It'll only get better.

天蠍座 (Scorpios)

Singles Awareness Day

What would i do without you?

Open your eyes.

Yet another Monday.

Traces of you everywhere.

Belated: What I wore on monday

Resistance is futile...

Moving on from coding.

Happy lunar new year!

Pre-CNY Preparations.

Is being pretty everything?

Awkwardly true...

For you kids out there...

No more Monday blues

Don't lose touch

Food is the best thing in the world

The HOHOHO Sleepover :D

Secrets.

My life is so repetitive.

MERRY CHRISTMAS Y^__^Y

Imy...

Navi ft Tablo - I LOVE YOU

Hardcore fangirl-ing

Level up!

PROM @SWISSOTEL

It was a bitter day.

I want to sing KTV.

리쌍 - Turned off the TV

The Ideal Job.

You don't know you're beautiful

Still me. Boring me.

【那些年，我們一起追的女孩】

&I will always love you

PUSH ON.

想自由

I'm BOM-BIASED!

指 望

Determination will get you through this.

Tired.

Super cheery song! :D

Never a right time to say goodbye.

One of the many late night suppers

To trust or not to trust.

Nutrients for the eyes!

it's Friday

I'm so addicted to you.

(Un)written rules of the world.

Nothing but pain.

步步惊心

ruined by education

God bless.

I only have 2 feet.

Working hard!

Escape this nonsense.

指望